4. You think you made them what they are.
Sometimes that can backfire on you, so watch out. Despite how much effort you think you have put into this person, you do not own them. You think you have made a mark, and taught them valuable lessons, so you don’t want to just give up on the relationship and have someone else benefit from your hard work. Listen up, sometimes you have to be thankful for what you had, and walk away. Is it really worth hanging on to something like this?
5. The happy memories are always with you.
And they are hard to let go of. Sure, they weren’t always toxic and harmful, otherwise you wouldn’t have fallen in love with them. However you need to keep in mind that wasn’t the real them, and they are showing you their true colours now. You need to let those memories go because as nice as they were, it just wasn’t real. Clinging to a false sense of love will only hurt you more in the long run.
6. You stay together for the kids.
I know this is a touchy subject. But the truth is often unpleasant. When you stay together in a toxic relationship for the sake of the kids, your intentions might be good, but it rarely ends well. Usually, when two people stay in a toxic relationship, there is resentment, anger, dishonesty- and your child picks up on all of these things. Even if you think they don’t. As James Baldwin wrote, “Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.”